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Area Man Reads One Word Then Comments on Status

“That’s all I need to see. I already know what it’s gonna’ say and I got all ya’ need to know, right here”, area man states.

Y’all have become so lazy. It’s like makin’ Ramen then calling it Pad Thai. We have become a society of headlines and sound bytes. Does anyone read the freakin’ story after the headline? Does anyone listen or view the whole segment after the sound byte? Read/hear it in context? Some of you don’t even get passed the first word! Come on now, I know you are all smarter than that! Headlines and sound bytes are made to grab your attention and hook you into the sensationalism and perhaps to mislead… a lot of you bought that hook, line, and sinker. 

I admit I’ve done it in the past, once in a while in the present, but I catch myself. I’m trying really really hard to practice what I preach, but sometimes the knee-jerk claws come out and I have to say to myself, “Calm down there, Vlad the Impaler”.

Some folks who are woefully misinformed start spouting off on the three words they read, and in a really hateful way mind you. Case in point, I’ve seen several accounts today repost the article from a myriad of major news outlets that Quaker Oats Company is changing the name (and subsequent logo) of its Aunt Jemima brand syrup. The most common form of the headline is “Aunt Jemima to change name, remove image from packaging”. Boom! Thus sets off the shitstorm…

Every Karen and Frank in the world… an aside, I am using the names Karen (you all know she is the “Let me speak to your manager” stereotype) and Frank (male form of Karen) as code words for the know-it-all, loudmouths, that insist they are right and will not back down from said opinion one iota. And I surely do not think every person named Karen and Frank are this way, my apologies. (And don’t call me Shirley) An aside aside… why do the majority of “Karens” on Facebook have joint accounts with their husband ala “KarenFrank Simmons”? Oh right, because they are usually control freaks and need to keep a leash on el husbando. I digress…

Every Karen and Frank in the world starts spouting off about the company or action in one or two words ” idiots”, “snowflakes”, “rewriting history”, “too sensitive”, “gone too far”, “there is no racism”, yadda yadda. I usually ask, “Did you read the article?” and it is usually met with “I don’t need to”. Well, you sir or madame are what we call a “jackass”. For example, here is an article about the rebrand taken from the Associated Press, which is considered to be one of, if not the most unbiased outlets in the U.S. 



If you read the article the company ADMITS that the brand was created in 1890 based on a “mammy” type character from an old minstrel show. Here is an early ad campaign for the brand…

“I’s in Town, Honey!” That’s some horrendously offensive stuff right there.

Shakin’ my head. How did they not get rid of the name 50 years ago I’ll never know. A. ny. way… my original point… maybe read some sh*t first before you go off with the hateful speech.

What is hateful speech? Oh, it’s just a lil somethin’ I made up. Well probably not, I’m sure the theory exists somewhere else but let’s pretend. It differs from “Hate speech” which is defined by EncyclopediaBrittanica.com as: “speech or expression that denigrates a person or persons on the basis of (alleged) membership in a social group identified by attributes such as race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, religion, age, physical or mental disability, and others.” Hateful speech as defined by Madge is: “speech or expression that denigrates and demeans anything and everything, based on nothing”.

It’s a knee-jerk reaction that’s very angry just for the sake of being angry. Get it? It’s the people that would read the headline and just post one or two-word answers, “Assholes”, “Stupid bitch!”, “Idiots”, etc. Hateful speech may also be combined with hate speech, “That stupid libtard bitch needs to be shot in the head” Wooh, that one’s a whopper, eh? Packed with so many internal issues, I don’t know where to begin! Especially if that one comes from a woman… “Paging Dr. Freud!” 

Whatever happened to civil discourse? We can agree to disagree we don’t need to bash the seemingly opposing side to a bloody pulp. You act like it’s black or white, right or wrong, winner or loser. It’s not! Sweet Baby Jesus in swaddling clothes it’s just a difference in opinion. Also, you will not switch anyone to your side, all it does is yell into your echo chamber of commiseraters who want to wallow and fester in each other’s anger. Girl, I got better things to do with my time…

And while we’re at it, I don’t want to be a wet blanket because I am certainly a fan of creative, playful name-calling but I’ve become hyper-aware that a lot of insults are basically just calling someone a woman. As if being a woman is insult enough. Ever notice that when most people are putting down a woman they feel the need to attach gender to it for extra oomf, they attach the word “bitch”? “Stupid bitch”, “Loud bitch”, etc. Is there a derogatory word that is male-specific? I guess “pussy” might, but then again that has female connotations. Pussy = vagina = woman = weak. Nobody feels the need to attach a man word when insulting a man. “Stupid man, driver!”. 

Then add in other specifics like whore, slut, twat… they are all insults and were designed for women. Yes, later man-whore and what-not were created but they are lighthearted in nature and don’t sting. I had a man on FB say “Fuck off, whore…” to me recently, I didn’t even know the guy, nor did I say anything whorish! Get it right, dude! Nevermind the flowery language, when you want to insult a man, all you need to do is compare him to a girl or woman, no need for adjectives! “You gossip like a woman”, “You throw like a girl”, “Stop being a little bitch”. So, according to society just being a woman is an insult. I’m not down with that. I invite you to bite me on that one. I might think of that ladies the next time you call another woman a stupid bitch. You’re insulting your own kind… and being an asshole.

Oh and back to my original point… read, watch, or listen to the whole thing before commenting… and make sure it’s a valid source. Thank you and goodnight. Tip your wait staff…

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