• margaretfmadigan

Blogging Under the Influence

I have a lot of projects going on right now.  I’ve been asked to do a few speaking engagements and I’m really excited about it.  Hopefully I’ll have video footage at some point.

So I haven’t had time to wri te a blog this week nor do I have enough brain power to come up with a subject.  To add insult to injury I went to the doctor and he gave me an antihistamine to take every night before bed.  See, being  a redheaded freckled Irish lass, I have crap skin.  Now I have this thing that when I go in the sun, I get some color (read: red) but then I get some red splotches and my arms, chest, and shoulders itch like crazy.  Oh sure it’s not bad enough that I look like a sheet of copy paper, no now I’ll look like I have measles or chicken pox or some I’m sort of meth head.

So I took this stuff last night before bed, along with a cream… and holy crap do I feel better!  I stopped itching and the blotches don’t look so angry.  But man it’s 2 in the afternoon and I’m still groggy!  I feel drunk, quite honestly.  And sleepy.  Sleepy drunk.  Lalalalala.  I can’t take anything that might possibly kinda’ sorta’ make a person sleepy… it’s almost certain I will be in a coma for a day or two.  Even stuff that’s not supposed to make you sleepy?  Oh that will somehow be lights out for me.

I have suffered from anxiety throughout my life, thanks to some awesome meds I don’t really have much trouble anymore.  However, my body has a memory of it’s own and sometimes my PTSD will kick in and I can’t relax.  (I have PTSD from incidences that occurred during my marriage) It’s like waiting for the Vietcong, ya’ know they’re gonna’ spring up on ya’ somehow, sometime!  So I take a Xanax.  Snaps me out of it but puts me in hibernation mode.  I can’t wake up.

If I’m still groggy from a med, I still forge ahead.  It’s like I took a double dose of Nyquil or something.  So I walk around, talking, working, and not making much sense.  And I’m trying to still act like I’ve got cat-like reflexes, when I actually have slower reaction time than a 16 year old who’s told to go do the dishes.

I’m trying hard to focus and write this but ya’ know what I really want to type right now?  This…

alkjf;ijeorihelkhglkhas;ldkjf  sheep bologna llkjdsijfijvijek cow cow cow cow cow kllksdjflkdjlkfj foofy foofy foo kjdlkjflkjelkjlkjc mee mee moh moh ma ma ma ma ama wlieuroieorijelijf;ijgfh

There that feels better.

I want cheese.

It’s nice not to itch.

My puppy pees a lot.  She peed on me yesterday as she jumped into my lap while in the car to say hello to some girls who came over to my window in the school parking lot.  She got awfully excited and couldn’t contain herself.  Eh, we’ve all had it happen.

I might take another nap now…

#cheese #anxiety #groggy #sleepy #drugs

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